Is mourning a release of tension and raising of hands in surrender, a time of processing, or a call to a different kind of inner work?
The general days of mourning for the Jewish people, which reach rock bottom on the Ninth of Av, and similarly any period of personal mourning, present a confrontation with deep crisis. It is no longer a temporary crisis that demands effort to overcome, but a sense of absolute cessation – the Divine Presence has departed and the Temple is destroyed, the soul has left, and the body is buried. What does one do now?
The Torah teaches that one cannot easily heal the breach, with a decision that 'the matter is closed, it’s time to move forward.' Time must be dedicated to the very act of mourning, to recognize the loss and grieve for it. Even the remedy for all illness and sorrow – the Torah, of which it is said "The precepts of God are just, rejoicing the heart" – is forbidden during the days of mourning. It seems that the encounter with death and destruction opens a dark void in the flow of life, which even the "Torah of life," "Torah of light," cannot fill (and from here we can also extrapolate to similar states of mind, even when there is no formal law of mourning, when a person feels that his world has darkened upon him and he is sunk in despair and futility, whether real or imagined).
On the other hand, it is certain that "the tzimtzum [the concealment of Divinity in the dark void] is not literal": The work of justifying the Divine judgment, beginning with the blessing of "the true Judge" through the verses of justification customarily recited at a funeral (and similarly in the Book of Lamentations and in the kinot), reminds us that everything comes from "God of faith without iniquity, righteous and upright is He," Who is present and watches over us even in times of darkness and crisis. The recitation of Kaddish is intended to fill the void in Divine service and in the revelation of Godliness that was created with the passing or destruction.
Therefore, we must understand that the 'nullification of Torah study' during the days of mourning makes time for fulfilling the mitzvah of teshuvah (return to God). The Midrash details how the question "What is the punishment for a sinner?" was presented to Wisdom, Prophecy, and Torah, and each provided an answer. Ultimately, the Holy One, Blessed be He answered, "Let him do teshuvah and he will be forgiven." The counsel of teshuvah is God's goodness, which is even above the Torah. The times when it is forbidden to study Torah call us to connect to God, the Giver of the Torah, in a deeper and more primal dimension.
Usually, teshuvah is perceived as strengthening and adding more Torah and mitzvot, another effort to overcome a fall or crisis. Regarding the days after mourning, there is also the dimension of adding life, goodness, and light to the world, for the elevation of the soul of the departed and to fill his vacant place. But in the days of mourning themselves, in the face of death and destruction, we speak of a deeper teshuvah – a release of our external worldview and return of all reality to the hands of God.
Thus was explained the chasidic custom of saying 'L'chaim' (‘to life’ on an alcoholic drink) for the elevation of a soul. Following a passing, people ponder how the situation could have been different. It is worthwhile to take a little 'mashke' (drink) and remember that "everything came into being by His word." (This is the blessing recited before most beverages). Here too, in relation to the days to come, lessons should be drawn in the world of action. In mourning, we feel the nothingness of man, his machinations and actions, and recognize the providence of the Almighty God.
In day-to-day life, we feel the power of the flow of life, and our work is to direct it according to the "Torah of life" and its commandments. Therefore, the first commandment is "be fruitful and multiply" – extending the infinite power of life for generations. In mourning, the transience of life in the world is felt, and it is precisely then that one can connect to "He who lives forever and exists eternally" above them and feel the eternal power with which the passing moment is charged when we identify in it God's will and providence. In this sense, "It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting."
Therefore, it is accepted that the prohibition to study Torah does not apply to the inner dimension of Torah. The inner dimension of the Torah is the Torah of teshuvah, which demonstrates the appearance of God's mercy even in destruction. It reveals the Divine plan of "descent for the purpose of ascent" within it, and primarily connects man to God's eternal essence that flickers in the darkness of the world – "If I make my bed in the depths, behold, You are there."
